[ John raises his hands a couple of times to sign and can't quite manage it. His hands are shaking. Eventually, he fishes his PDA out from his pocket and spends a moment typing into it.

This is one time he's legitimately glad he can not sign. ]

i think
i think i need to
i don't know.
i need to do something.
what is there to do here?

[ He looks a little desperate. Maybe if he doesn't think about it right now, it won't be true. It hasn't happened yet. If he gets back, he can change it.

Yeah.

And he doesn't need to freak out about it because he won't let it happen. He won't. ]