lil cal can suck my fucking dick
actually no
shit
thats terrifying
i already get attacked by plump smupette rumps all the time
i do not need some creepy fucking puppet going down on me like a cheap whore

Wait. Wait. Dirk knows who Lil Cal is though. What...that doesn't make any fucking sense. Lil Cal was always part of the Strider household. His household. Fuck, Dirk's last name is Strider. But Dirk was just a little older then him. It was always him and Sis...

Oh shit fuck.

also
i guess i should inform you since you obviously dont seem to realize
but this place is a shithole that fucks with our memories
you might not realize it but
spoiler
youre missing some memories
if you ask everyone else who got dragged to this happiest place on earth but not really
everyone is missing bits of their memories
you cannot bullshit me into thinking you somehow have kept every fucking memory of yours intact