rakuen | Regaining Memories

Entry tags:

Regaining Memories

Characters: Lelouch and Suzaku
Format: Log
This log is: closed
Location: Suzaku's room
Summary: ~~The first memory regain of the game!~~ Oops or not
Warnings: Aaaaaangst and Suza/Lulu adorableness.

Following the battle (in a matter of speaking), Lelouch had another business matter to tend to. That was the small pouch occupying his pocket. Once they entered, it was fortunate that none of Suzaku's roommates were around. Lelouch would not have hesitated to kick them out if there had been. He made himself comfortable on a bed and loosened the top couple buttons of his shirt. He sighed, and the stiffness he'd been carrying all day finally began to fade. This was his first opportunity to relax since the rest day. Whatever kind of day that was. He laid back on the bed, leaving his feet on the floor.

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Suzaku was still annoyed about the battle, he obviously was glad that he had won, and therefore could protect Lelouch easier than he could before, but the whole thing did not feel right. He felt like he had cheated since it had not been a fight at all. He didn't say anything though just sat at the end of his bed.

"How do they work then? Do you just put them on the bracelet to activate them?"

"I would have expected you to have gotten around to reading the manual by now," he said. "Yes, that is what I have to do." But he didn't seem to be in a big hurry to do it.

He looked over at Suzaku. It was difficult to have a moment alone, so while a certain Witch might call him selfish and sentimental, he really didn't want to interrupt it with business. But it seemed no matter what, there was always something or the other in the way. That was his purpose, in the end. To create a peaceful world for Nunnally. And if he had to give up quiet moments like these, then so be it.

After a long moment of just looking, he sat up again. He pulled out the pouch and emptied it into his hand. There was a moments' hesitation, though. He glanced back at Suzaku, then back to his hands. But he still didn't make a move.

Suzaku shrugged, "I read some of it," enough to know how to fight for the purpose of winning Lelouch anyways. He sat in silence a moment, sensing the mood and then watched as Lelouch took out the charm. He was a bit worried, the only thing Suzaku could think that he had forgotten was that Nunnally was their enemy, and he worried about what that would do to him, to lose her even as he had just got her back.

"I think it is always better to know, our memories are part of us..." His tone was weird, memory loss was a bitter subject between them, but when Suzaku chased that thought down he was just met with a headache and pulled his thoughts away.

He felt a hot anger well up inside. For a brief moment, he recalled memories that had been taken from him by force. Charles' Geass.

This wasn't like him. He attached the charm to the bracelet.

There was a faraway look in his eyes as the memory came back. Back in that train station again. He was running up the stairs. There, on the ground, lay a friend, and someone he loved very much. He lurched forward, clutching at his chest and his head. He squeezed his eyes shut. His heart ached. His mind burned with a hot rage. Who had killed her? Rolo? That traitor! How could his own brother have done such a thing? He would have to be carefully dealt with.

But as the scenes ended, his body relaxed, slowly. He scrubbed at his face and just let his head hang, with his hair in his face. "Shirley," he said simply.

Suzaku watched carefully as he put the memory charm on, he had never seen anyone regain a memory, it was obvious very quickly that it was not a good one, at his words Suzaku looked down. Shirley, who had killed herself, after they thought they had saved her.

He should have never left her, there had been an attack and he had put his duty as a knight first, leaving her with the police, but... he should have done better, not left her, saved her...

"Lelouch..."

He pushed his hair out of his face and looked out across the room, not at Suzaku. He lowered his emotional guard. It would be a smoother process of absorbing the experience if he let it go how it liked. "She didn't kill herself.

"Lord Jeremiah caused her to remember things I had sealed away from her. She sought me out. She wanted to help me because she had fallen in love with me." Those words came out heavier than some of the others. "Rolo found her first, though. He killed her. He told me himself. He wanted me to be proud for eliminating a threat..." As much as he tried to let it be hidden behind his hair, and keep a stoic face, he couldn't help the tears. They came on their own.

Suzaku blinked, she... didn't kill herself? But he had heard...

Why had Lelouch sealed things away from Shirley? What didn't he want her to remember? Suzaku's head was pounding now, Rolo? Rolo had killed her?

Rolo who had been sent to act as Lelouch's brother because... because...

His headache got worse and he reached out to touch Lelouch's shoulder unsure of what to do, he wasn't good with tears...

Lelouch wiped his face off. "Rolo had put the gun he'd used in her hand to make it look like a suicide. I was there when she died. I got there too late. She'd bled too much...." He reached up and put his hand on Suzaku's. "You at least deserve to know the truth."

Suzaku listened with a sense of growing horror, he nodded, thankful that Lelouch had told the truth. "It wasn't your fault... sometimes you just... can't save people..."

He leaned over, and put his weight on Suzaku. Not that there was much of it in the first place. He was quiet for a long couple minutes as the gears began to turn at full speed again.

Finally, he put voice to his thoughts. "I'm going to destroy this place. So we can go home. But to do that, we'll have to play their game. Earn our memories back. Improve our weapons. And find the six stars."

Suzaku was used to much heavier people (Gino) leaning on him, so he merely sat silently while Lelouch thought. He scowled at the words though, "From the sound of it, it will take a long time, perhaps a year. We don't have a year..." He knew Lelouch had forgotten a lot, but he would at least understand the urgency. In a year Schneizel would have won completely, there would be no chance of a peaceful world, Britannia would get more powerful, everything they ever fought for would have been for nothing.

"We don't have time." He said again, staring into the distance.

"We don't have a choice. I have scoured this campus, and anything we would try to do requires more strength as a part of this system than we currently possess.

"And if they can take us from times where our memories are different, then we can certainly use it to go back to the time when we had left."

Suzaku frowned, he wasn't sure that it would be that easy but he nodded anyways. "So we do as they say? And fight, to regain more memories and upgrades. Do you have any idea what the stars are?"

"I saw one such star appear during the exhibition matches they showed us. It occurred when one of the weapons was drawn. But I have yet to see one appear when other weapons are drawn. What is it about those pairs that is different than the pairs we've seen so far? It's too simple to say that they're Prefects and Headmistresses, because we're expected to find them too." He thought through the rest of that poem Golbez had discussed on the network.

"The six demons no doubt refers to the members of the staff we've already seen, plus another. That sixth could be the shopkeeper, but I have yet to find any evidence to confirm that. And as for the demon lord and the princess...they have yet to show themselves." Or had they? Considering he'd just got done calling himself a demon during the negotiations with Nanami, he wondered if those roles were still in flux.

"I don't know," he thought, he had almost forgotten about the stars that had appeared then. How were they meant to find stars? And demons? "Perhaps the other one is someone higher than the mayor..." He said thinking.

After all there was no doubt Nanami could work as a demon, she had even said herself. The shop keeper though, she did not seem like a devil at all. "There was a knight as well, Nanami said there was a knight who tried to save a princess from a demon Lord."

He didn't mention that Nanami had put Lelouch in the princesses position. He frowned, it sounded like a fairy tail, and yet this place was anything but.

"The knight would be whoever it is that is attempting to win the game. So perhaps the Demon Lord and the princess vary from person to person." He sighed. "What is important is that Nunnally is protected. And whatever we do, we do it without arousing too much suspicion from the staff and Britannia. She recognized me and she's convinced she needs to protect me from Zero. I have hopefully convinced her that her presence around me will only draw him to me."

Suzaku nodded, he agreed with Britannia actually, Zero was here even though Suzaku hadn't seen him since the train, which means that he was in Fortitude, which meant Lelouch was in danger from him. Suzaku was grateful to Britannia to offering to protect him even though he could see why Lelouch wasn't.

"I believe Gino has Nunnally as a weapon, we can try and win her off him..." he frowned.

He nodded. "Yes, that is something I would like for us to do." He closed his eyes and rolled his head back onto Suzaku's shoulder. The fact that Players couldn't touch the Weapons of others made their relationship problematic. But it could be overcome.

Suzaku let Lelouch lean on him as they spoke, "I will challenge him then," he wondered which weapon to ask to fight with him. Not Lelouch, he didn't want to risk losing him to Gino.

"Consider me just as viable a choice for a Weapon as any others that you have at your disposal." If there's one thing he knew, it was how Suzaku's mind worked. Or didn't, as the case may be.

Suzaku shook his head, "No," he looked down, not for this fight anyways. Though he didn't think Gino would try anything here, where there was no one to order him to he could not risk it, after he had stood with Schneizel when Lelouch had taken the throne.

"Do you honestly think he would cause me harm? In either case, a win or a loss, Nunnally and I would be seeing more of each other. If Gino's goal is to keep her away from me, then there is no chance of victory for him if I am the weapon you use." There was a pause. "Unless my weapon isn't strong enough."

"No, not while he is obeying Nunnally," Suzaku said truthfully, he did have a point though. But still Suzaku did not like the idea of using Lelouch in that particular fight.

"I don't know, have you bought any of those power rings yet?" He had been reading the manual finally.

"One, aside from the one I was given so kindly by our hosts." He showed Suzaku the Undead ring. He looked rather amused, actually.

Suzaku looked anything but amused, "You got that after you died?" Did that mean dying here did something to your weapon? Suzaku made a note to look that up.

"I have enough raks, I could get you a couple more."

"It would be helpful, yes. It's such a bother to have to have you do the shopping on days that aren't rest days." He sighed in exasperation.

Suzaku nodded, "It is just another way they enforce their unfair system..." He frowned, "But I don't mind buying them for you."

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Regaining Memories

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