rakuen | [text]

okay so
took a little impromptu nap there
orange sleeping beauty woken up by a slobbery kiss from the frog prince himself
my entire face will break out in warts and zits
just like the pizzafaced kid in the back of everyones class photo
hit puberty little too early
sprouting up like a weed
bones twisting and metamorphosing into a teenage butterfly
pitch dropping with his testicles and hair growing in places no one wants to see
thanks for that one rakuen
my glorious visage marred by the trademark of growing up
just like halloween

you all better get in line cause
im brewing a goddamn cauldron full of bubble and trouble and its first come first serve
this shit is nasty once its cold and not in a good way
so
no reserves no holding off
just the wafting fucking aroma of stale farts
basically im tooty after gruntilda got through with her and im bitter as hell about it
going to cause some bonafide mischief now that im back
in the form of a potion that makes you shit your pants
but shh shh you didnt hear it from me

so yeah
back to my personal sleepless hell
sup guys im just feeling fresh and REfreshed
ready to take on the endless day and night once again
looking forward to that

anyways
cant be assed to read over all of this forum post shit so
what did i miss

[[ back after some hiatus. davesprite was in a coma during most of this, feel free to handwave any interactions there. no need to consult me! & replies will be in orange unless you opt out! ]]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

She's here now, which means she didn't just disappear from existence. Surely there's still something that can be done.
I don't know a whole lot about time. My aspect is heart. I figure you know your shit and that's why I'm asking you.
I'd apologize for undoubtedly dredging up unpleasant memories, but like you said, it's pretty fucking hard to phase a Dave.

cool as a cucumber over here dude
un fucking phaseable

yeah i know a thing or two about time
dunno why shes here though
she shouldnt be
jades from my timeline should be extinct like our feathery friend the dodo
maybe shes from an alternate timeline though
totally possible
a timeline where somehow i managed to save her without destroying her existence

hahahaha shit
im sincerely doubting it by which i mean its pretty much impossible
since shes kind of aware of fading into nonexistence it seems like
but yeah
spent about a year once you calculate in all the time loops fucking around trying to salvage the timeline
so i dont know

i think youre underestimating what it means to be doomed
you said it yourself youre the welcome mat of time
only good for wiping your shoes off on

I knew it. Mind holding onto some ice cream for me? I don't have anywhere to put it but I know it'll stay chilled with you.

So there's absolutely nothing that can be done. Once we beat this shitty MMO fighter she just vanishes into thin air.
Yeah, I don't think fucking so.

[ there is no reply for about five minutes, whereas before replies came nearly instantaneously ]

what do you thinks going to happen to me in the end
it comes with the territory
were kind of locked in

What do you mean, happen to you?
I was under the impression that even after you altered the flow of the timeline you continued to exist. Was I mistaken?

ive been turned into a game construct dude
and im also from a doomed timeline

people from doomed timelines die or stop existing
one or the other it happens eventually
some sooner than others but in the end it goes down to nothing
its why theyre called doomed
i guess i shouldnt be surprised your dumb ass needs that spelled out

If you're expecting me to feel embarrassed or offended, you're getting your hopes up. I'm not to blame for this city dragging me here before I ever got a chance to start playing.
I'm also not too proud to ask stupid questions as long as it means I wind up perfectly clear on the answers.
Care to elaborate on the whole game construct business?

yeah whatever

im a sprite
something that the game puts out there
to guide the little ducklings that are its players along
like the voice that plays over your shitty attempts to play a new games tutorial level
only less shitty and annoying and more totally fucking awesome

[ So once the game's done, Dave is saying... Yikes. ]

Sounds brilliant. Ocarina of Time would have been a hell of a lot less irritating if it had been you instead of that annoying little fairy.

yeah no shit
everything would be better with a little more strider in it

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