Movovie Night

[fracturedsoul]

Characters: Everyone
Format: Whichever you prefer
This log is: open
Location: Rakuen Public Library's media viewing room
Summary: Dirk shows off some 21st century cinematic masterpieces.
Warnings: Horrible movies. Swearing from Striders. The usual.

The time has come. Seven o'clock on the dot and Dirk is standing at the front of the viewing room in the city library to one side of the screen which is currently tuned to static, remote control in one of his hands.

There's plenty of room for everyone who shows up. The accommodations are a bit more classroom-like than he'd have liked -- tables and chairs for everyone to sit at -- but scattered about are some snacks and drinks he's scavenged from the Fortitude cafeteria.

Sit down. Watch these films. There are ten of them, and Dirk can go all night.

Comments

BEFORE SEVEN

[fracturedsoul]

Dirk can be found setting things up in the viewing room. Care to bother him or, alternatively, lend a hand?

At about 6:45, he can be found sitting in a corner, asleep. Have to go find Jade and let her know it's time.

SEVEN O'CLOCK

[fracturedsoul]

The movies begin.

There's really not much to say about them. Imagine this comic strip, in movie form, starring Owen Wilson and Ben Stiller, and featuring Donald Glover (and then, in the films made after his assassination, a cardboard cutout of Donald Glover). They contain music that, at points, sounds something like this.

(When asked about the plot of SBAHJ the Moive, Andrew Hussie had this to say:

I don't know, but I think plot is probably the wrong word.

Opening the film with a ten minute montage of bro falling down some stairs would probably be the conservative approach. Just some really solid stage setting, established in classical film making tradition to butter up the critics. It also clearly sets up a strong antagonist for the moive, stairs. It is a foe which is never bested, for you see, the film is an American tragedy.

Other than that, probably lots of profane non sequitur and hug bumps issued by Wilson and Stiller, who will have been heavily coached in their acting to achieve a sort of rigid, surrealistic demeanor just off the mark of any heretofore observed human behavior. Like the uncanny valley of mannerism. Lace heavily with artifacts, visual and audible, and don't be surprised if at some point a 20 minute clip of a completely different movie is inserted, uncut, flipped vertically, and tortured with various Photoshop filters. Finally, the climax will be the stunning resolution to a series of dilemmas not previously introduced in the film, all of which center around the inability of either character to perform simple motor functions. Then we see oversaturated low quality footage of Tony Hawk doing grinds while the credits roll, which contain not a single word which isn't "fuck."

So yeah, they're pretty much shit.)

(Reply to this thread directly to converse with Dirk during the movies; otherwise, feel free to start new threads for mingling and reacting to the horror on-screen.)

[heiropaque]

Equius turns up with almost unnerving punctuality, and he's not even that damp or smelly. Yet. To properly show his noble and refined disdain for these human contrivances he's about to view, he takes a seat near the back, arms folded and expression suitably unimpressed behind his shades.

[greenspaces]

She's asleep, of course, curled up in the middle of her and Sora's shared bed. But on Prospit she's in the middle of an excited conversation with no less than five Prospitian pawns, a crown of golden flowers on top of her head. When she spots Dirk, she waves.

"Hi Dirk! Are you here to have fun with me? Do you want to meet my new friends?"

Re: SEVEN O'CLOCK

[greenspaces]

She's star-struck by the movie, watching the actors fall down the stairs again and again, and even the random photoshop filters. Eventually she elbows Dirk to ask an important question.

"Was this made by Dave?"

[fracturedsoul]

Oh, it's that one guy he'd talked to last week. Dirk stops by to say hi.

"Hi. So you made it."

[fracturedsoul]

This is weird.

Prospit is surprisingly similar in architectural design to Derse, but everything is so bright it would have blinded him if he weren't wearing his shades.

Dirk spends a few minutes figuring out the general lay of the land. He instinctively wants to keep to back alleys, and whenever a Prospitian spots him it's all he can do not to start wandering aimlessly, pretending to be sleepwalking. Old habits die hard.

He does find Jade before long, though, and waves when she sees him.

"No time for that, Harley. It's almost seven."

[fracturedsoul]

There's a small grin on Dirk's face when she asks that.

"Yeah. By the Dave from my side of the Scratch."

[ecthelion]

Ein had been in the library earlier, and in a maybe-rare fit of competence someone on staff had told him to come back later for a movie night. Or, you know, there could have been a sign or something.

He'd had no idea what that meant. Of course he was here.

He's not concerned with the content so much yet...

Re: SEVEN O'CLOCK

[dr4gonst4ff]

[The only reason she's here is that she heard a movie. Now she's watching it.. and so confused.]

Hey! You! You are the one playing this movie, correct? What on earth am I watching? [She's figured out how to make a >:? face and she's using it right now. She's also speaking much too loudly to be polite.]

[pennypincher]

Lemina was interested in this "movie night" ordeal, having never seen a movie before in her life, so she stopped by and wound up sitting next to Ein.

"Do you know what's going on?"

[fracturedsoul]

[ It doesn't really matter if she's being loud; Dirk's not going to shush her. ]

This? It's Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff the Moive. [ No, he didn't stutter, and it's not French. ] A piece of cinematic artwork from my universe.

[dr4gonst4ff]

Artwork? [Well okay.] It smells pretty shitty if you ask m--

[Oh hello shitty photoshop filters. SUDDENLY COLORS EVERYWHERE. And Terezi is now cackling.] Woah! I did not know it did that! Okay, this is great now, hehehe! [She will ignore non-existant plotline now, and acquire a state of sugar-highness known only to the Pyrope family.]

[heiropaque]

"Of course I did." How insulting, to think he'd break his word or betray someone so - currently - unimportant.

[fracturedsoul]

[ ...smells? Dirk arches an eyebrow in Terezi's direction. But hey, it looks like she's gaining an appreciation for it. ]

It does that and so much more. If you like that, just wait.

[sobsprite]

Jadesprite floats down the hall wearing her Conquest vest and the skirt. She supposed she ought to play along with what was going on here. As she peered into the room, she let out a short, high pitched whine. She wasn't sure about this.

[dr4gonst4ff]

[She's watching this like a child window-shopping in a toy store, and licking her lips every once in a while. Eventually...]

...Can I lick the screen? Can I can I can I??? [Less of a "do you mind" and more of a "will it disappear if I do" here.]

[fracturedsoul]

No you fucking can not. This is a movie party, not an all you can eat buffet.

[knightime]

The right word for what Dave is feeling right now is overwhelmed. As in he's completely and utterly overwhelmed.

Seeing his comics turned into actual movies. Apparently movies that were incredibly influential and amazing (really, they're pretty much shit) was pretty mind boggling.

He had no idea how to react to this. Mostly, he didn't know how to react to it without looking like a completely uncool spaz. Or absconding. Shit. If he just sits here like a fucking rock, maybe that would work. That's a fucking dumb idea and he should feel ashamed for considering it. He should be trying to be all smug because hey, he's some super cool movie producer. Naw.

[knightime]

Oh hey. You might have felt hands on your shoulders. Well. He would have said something like a good sup or boo, but he kind of can't. So it's just hands on your shoulders.

He knew Jadesprite was around, but not really. He saw conversations here and there on the network, but hadn't actually contacted her personally.

[greenspaces]

"So he's your Bro? Does that mean he's cooler over there?"

[fracturedsoul]

Dirk wasn't expecting anyone, not even Dave, to pick up on the oodles and oodles of symbolism interwoven into those hideous filters and artifacts. He knew that to anyone not in the loop the SBAHJ movies would just look like so much shit piled on top of festering shit.

Still, every so often he chanced a glance over at Dave to see how he was taking this. Completely motionless and cool? Prior to getting to know the kid, Dirk would have expected that from the younger version of his ancestor. Now, though, it strikes him as odd.

[fracturedsoul]

"Yeah, but that's not hard. Your Dave's a total dork." But he says it with love. "I call him my bro, but it's more complicated than that. I can explain later when we're not in the middle of this."

[greenspaces]

Jade seems exactly where she should be: right at home in the middle of a bunch of admiring new friends. She thinks about that for a minute -- she's still a little scatterbrained on Prospit, that much hasn't changed -- before nodding.

"Your movies, right? We're watching them?"

She excuses herself from the gaggle of friends, hugging them each and wishing them well before slipping away to meet Dirk. Jade takes his hand and starts walking. "Do you like it here? Isn't it nice?"

[greenspaces]

Jade notices that Dave's not saying anything; she scoots over to wrap her arms around him, leaning her head on his shoulder.

"These are good. Do you like them?"